


I wish I were her

by twdsnsd18



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Based on a Conan Gray Song, Developing Friendships, F/F, heather - Freeform, samo arent a couple just a couple of besties
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:26:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26331868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twdsnsd18/pseuds/twdsnsd18
Summary: Sana is in love with Momo but Momo and Mina are in love with each other.
Relationships: Hirai Momo/Minatozaki Sana, Hirai Momo/Myoui Mina
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> Conan Gray's Heather was the cause of this.

It’s the second semester of her last year in high school. Sana is semi excited about college because yay new path but oh no new path to adulthood. 

She checks herself in the mirror one last time. Making sure nothing of her appearance is out of place. Not that she’s one much to be so invested in her looks but who knew if there would be a new student joining (although it was rare for someone to transfer in the middle of the year). So first impressions are always at the forefront of her mind.

Because it would haunt her if she left a horrible first impression on someone.

Two Bentos are waiting for her on the counter and Sana slides them into her bag. She texts Momo that she’s headed down already. Momo replies with a single smiley face and that’s all Sana needs to know that she's already waiting for her.

Munching on a bagel and eyes deadest on her phone is Momo. Sana’s lips turn up fast as she heads to her.

“Morning!”

Momo snaps her head from her phone to her. “Finally.”

“I’m not even late.”

“That’s not what I mean. Finally, I get to see you.” Momo sends a smile and starts walking in the direction of their school.

Sana pats her chest, taking even-paced breaths. Momo never fails to make her heart palpitate as early as she could. 

She catches up to her, taking a bento out from her bag and handing it over. “Mom cut your sausages into the shape of an octopus, just how you like it.”

Momo gasps, quickly opening it. She snatches one of the octopus sausages and pops it in her mouth. “I don’t know why but they just taste the best like this.”

Sana chuckles. “That’s because you’re still a child at heart.”

“And that’s such a bad thing?”

They’ve caught up with other students from their school. Mostly everyone is in pairs or triples. Occasionally there are students who walk alone, earbuds in or noses in a book. 

Sana has never walked alone to school. Her and Momo always went together, since they were kids.

“No, that’s the best thing about you.”

Momo grins, eyes curving. And Sana, well, she falls a little deeper.

~~~~

Unlike the previous years of being in separate classes, Sana is glad that her last year in high school she and Momo are in the same class. Because of their last names they are apart but only by a few desks. Meaning, they sit in the same row and the four classmates between them are probably at their wits end from dealing with their childish antics of throwing small erasers, tiny bundles of paper, and Momo’s ugly faces that she makes at Sana when the teacher is focused on writing on the board.

Today is the opening ceremony for the fall semester. It’s an easy and short day. They’re all filed in lines by class sections in the gymnasium as the principal drones on about hoping the third years will enjoy their last semester peacefully and joyfully. The student president is called on stage to make a speech but the entire time, Sana is busy trying to garner Momo’s attention from where she stands down the row from her.

When that ends, they go back to their homeroom to relapse the future activities they will be partaking in. Basically they’re already deciding on what they should do for the culture festival that would be happening in a month. 

“Let’s do a Maid cafe!” one of the boys suggests, earning immediate agreement from the rest of the boys.

A girl then proposes, “What about a haunted house?”

The class is split in half. Sana isn’t one for horror but it beats dressing up as a maid. 

“We can just be a normal restaurant and serve normal food.”

Nobody says anything to that. Sana commends the brave soul for putting something ordinary out there but everyone knew the cultural festivals were for a time of celebration and fun. Anything beyond normalcy was a must.

Then Sana gets an idea that she hopes would appeal to everyone. “Why not a horror-themed cafe?” Everyone looks at her then. Even Momo raises a questioning eyebrow at her. She shrugs. “Just a suggestion.”

Someone mumbles, “That may be a good idea.”

And then, they’re suddenly planning on how to pull off the best, scariest, most horrifying cafe ever. 

Sana is put on flyer duty, her classmates saying her bubbly and social personality will work wonders to get people to come in. She doesn’t argue because then she’d have lots of free time after finishing handing out flyers. 

Momo volunteers for waitressing, saying she had previous experience and would do a splendid job. Sana laughs to herself because the experience Momo is talking about is from her job she got hired at last year at a restaurant and then fired only two weeks later as she kept messing up which orders went to which table. But that would be kept to herself.

The whole class was so invested in this that time flew by and it was lunchtime already. Sana goes to her bag, ready to scarf down her lunch. She’d worked up a hunger.

“Wanna eat here or our spot?” Momo asks, Bento in hand.

Sana thinks while looking out the window. The weather wasn’t too bad but she was too lazy to walk outside to their usual spot at the benches. “Let’s eat here today.”

Momo pushes a desk next to Sana’s, plopping onto the seat and quickly unpacking her lunch. She goes right for the rest of the sausages, humming contently with each chew. Sana does the same.

“Tomorrow it’s my turn to make lunch.”

“You mean your mom’s turn.”

“Hey! I help her. Who do you think stirs while my mom throws in seasoning after seasoning?”

“Sorry, sorry, I forgot I was talking to a five-star chef.”

They laugh and continue eating. After lunch, they’ll regroup quickly as a class and then their day ends there and they are free to leave.

Momo finishes her food fast, leaned back against the chair, patting her tummy happily. “That was the best meal ever.”

“You say that about every meal.”

“I like food.”

“And yet you still have abs.”

Momo shrugs, “Fast metabolism.” she then gasps. “We don’t have any drinks!”

Sana chokes on her rice, Momo’s sudden yelling surprising her. “Are you...trying to...kill me?!”

“I’ll get us some.”

Before Sana can tell her what she wants, Momo is gone. It’s not like she needs to anyways. Momo always brings her exactly what she likes.

While she waits, Sana takes out her phone to check her social media. The first thing that pops up on her Twitter timeline is a tweet by someone from the school in all caps: _AWE STRIKING SECOND YEAR TRANSFER ASLJFHAKJFHA._ The keyboard smash, in Sana’s opinion, might have been too much but then again she sometimes randomly tweets a keyboard smash when Momo does something involuntarily cute.

She scrolls through her feed, in search of a pic or other post about this second-year transfer. She doesn’t find anything so gives up and puts her phone away. 

By the time Momo gets back Sana finishes her last bite of lunch. She reaches out for her strawberry milk from Momo, who she now notices is distracted. She waves a hand rapidly in front of her face. “You alright? Hello? Earth to Momo.”

And Momo only responds with what Sana can differ as a dazed sigh. 

Sana resorts to shaking her by the shoulders but that does nothing. She then pinches her by the cheeks, pulling at them. Nothing still. A closer look at Momo, she notices her cheeks are blushed. Strange.

“I just saw the most beautiful, ethereal girl ever.”

Momo always says stuff like that about her favorite idols but this...this is completely earnest and genuine and Sana doesn’t like it one bit.

So she makes a joke out of it. “Aw, Momo, I didn’t know you thought of me that way.”

If this were before Momo stepped out the classroom she would have responded with either an annoyed look or a playful affirmation. But Momo only says, “Not you, Sana, I’m talking about the girl I saw at the vending machines.”

Ouch. That hurt. “Oh, right, duh. I was playing with you.”

“I’ve never seen her before. I know she’s new, I wonder what year she is. I wonder what her name is.”

Then it clicks. Momo had seen the keyboard smash inducing second-year transfer. It had to be her. 

“Why didn’t you ask her?”

Momo snaps out of her trance finally. “Ask her?! If I got close to her I’m sure her blinding beauty would disintegrate me!”

Sana doesn't know what this girl looks like but she finds it difficult to believe she’s that attractive. “Knowing you, I bet you’re exaggerating her looks.”

Leaning forward, clutching the desk in a tight grip, Momo emphasizes, “She’s a literal angel, Sana! I saw a divine being with my own eyes.”

“Sure, you did. I’ll believe it when I see her.”

“Then let's go find her!” Momo grabs her by the wrist, starts dragging her out of the classroom into any direction.

Sana wants to resist because she’s not sure she can handle seeing Momo so entranced with a girl but then she was also highly curious about what this transfer looked like and if she actually displayed the divinity that Momo claims.

They go everywhere they think of but the girl is nowhere to be found. Momo seems desperate and Sana is exhausted from all the jogging they’ve done.

“Maybe tomorrow,” Sana says, huffing tiredly.

“I can’t wait until tomorrow. I need to see her again right now.”

“Lunch ends soon though.”

“I’ll risk being late.”

Sana narrows her eyes. “For a girl, you don’t even know? Seriously, Momo?”

“It’s not like I’ll get in trouble. We’re leaving right after anyway.”

The last thing Sana wants is for Momo to get in trouble for being tardy, early release or not. So she starts pulling her by the arm. “Why not wait at the school entrance instead, you’re bound to see her if you rush fast enough.”

It’s like a lightbulb goes off on top of Momo’s head. “Sana, you’re brilliant!” she squishes her into a hug. “This is why we work so well together. I’m the muscles and you’re the brain.”

Cheeks warming, Sana lets Momo continue squeezing as they walk back to the classroom. Why she even gave a suggestion is beyond her. It’s selfish but she hopes the girl leaves before Momo can even get down to the entrance.

~~~~

As soon as they’re excused, Momo zooms out of the classroom. Not even bothering to take her bag. Sana ignores the small bitter feeling that is starting to stir inside her and grabs Momo’s bag. They’ll be walking home together anyway.

She takes her time descending the stairs. Smiling occasionally at the students. She doesn’t know many of them but with the way they blush when she smiles at them, they must know her. Sana isn’t popular, per se, but she has gotten her fair confessions and love notes over the years. 

All of them resulting in her rejection because she only has feelings for one person. She did, however, feel terrible about breaking their hearts and ruining their imaginations and fantasies of a possible romance with her. After all, Sana knows how it is to like someone who feels unreachable.

Sana takes off her indoor slippers and slides into her outdoor shoes. She hopes Momo changed her shoes before heading outside.

Students linger at the shoe locker, talking, and making plans. Some students are headed to club meetings. Others are changing into athletic wear for the sports clubs. Sana isn’t part of any club, never felt drawn to one. Neither was Momo.

They always preferred grabbing a bite to eat and then going over each other’s houses. Today they would be headed to Momo’s house. If all stays according to their plan.

She walks out, eyes flurrying all over the place to spot Momo. It’s had to find her when everyone is wearing the same clothing. She stands on her tiptoes, craning her neck to look above everyone. 

Sana keeps walking towards the gate. It’s then she hears hushed whispering to her side. A trio of girls. They’re covering their mouths as they speak, making their words unintelligible. But they're pointing and Sana has a feeling they’re not saying nice things.

She looks in the direction of their points and feels her mood not just dampen but burn and crash.

Momo is there. Talking with the second year transfer. Who Sana gives reason to Momo’s description of being a beautiful, literal angel. This girl was born with beauty.

The girl is smiling widely. Her gums are showing. Her eyes are curving. Then for a moment she looks away from Momo and makes eye contact with Sana. Momo follows her line of vision and then immediately her expression turns brightly. She waves Sana over.

Sana could walk back into the school and claim to have forgotten something. Or, she could head on over there and meet this girl that has swooned Momo off her feet so quickly.

So she starts heading to them, her grip super tight on the strap of her’s and Momo’s bag.

“Mina, this is Sana.” Sana gives a tight wave.

Mina bows her head in greeting. “Nice to meet you, Sana-san.”

“Sana is fine.”

“Are you sure? It’d be rude of me to not use honorifics since we don’t know each other.”

“Honorifics are beyond me. I tell all my friends that...newly founded ones too.” Sana realizes she’s being way nicer to Mina than she originally expected. “Because I do hope we become friends.”

Mina blinks. She then grins. “Of course, I’d like that. Please, drop honorifics with me as well.”

Momo throws an arm around Sana’s neck, causing her to stumble. ”Aw, look at you two. Already on the way to becoming new BFF’s. Where will that leave me though?”

Sana shrugs Momo off, pretending to be disgusted with her pout. “Please, Momo, stop pouting like a child.”

“Hey, you told me this morning that my child-like heart was the best thing about me.”

Sana tosses Momo’s bag at her. She feigns knowledge of that. “When did I say that? I don’t recall saying anything like that at all.”

Mina giggles. “I can see why you two get along well. You click well together.”

“Right?! Sana is the brain and I’m the muscles because...you know…” Momo leans toward Mina and whispers as if she were sharing top-secret information. “I’ve got abs.”

Sana hears it and yanks Momo away. “Alright, back it up. You need to learn how to restrain yourself from mentioning that you have abs every five minutes.”

“Well, Momo, you’re not the only one who has abs here.” Sana and Momo raise their eyebrows at the statement. Mina chuckles nervously. “Too much?”

Momo breaks out into laughter, Sana simply smiles. 

“Walk home with us, Mina.” Momo offers, eyes already shining with hope.

Mina thinks for a moment. Then nods. “As long as you two don’t mind me intruding.”

Before Sana can say anything, Momo and Mina start walking off. She hears Momo tell her, “Trust me, you’re doing us--me--a blessing by joining us. Sana makes boring small talk.”

“I do not!” she protests, steps behind them because there's no room for her to walk beside them.

“Sana and I were planning to head over to my house. If you’re not busy or anything…” Momo’s cheeks reddened. She's turned shy. Sana rarely sees Momo this shy. “Would you like to come over as well? I promise you, aside from Sana’s boring talk, we’re really fun.”

Sana mentally prays that Mina declines. And that she’ll decline every time in the future. The girl is nice but if her and Momo’s time together turned into her, Momo, and Mina’s time together, she didn’t know if she could bear through it. Mostly because Momo’s heart eyes would hurt her own heart.

“If it’s alright with Sana.”

They come to a stop. Mina and Momo turn to her. “Why would it matter what I think? It’s Momo’s house.”

Mina gives a small smile. “But it’d be rude to not consider your opinion. This is your relationship too.”

Relationship? What the heck was Mina talking about? But Momo speaks before her. “Sana and I aren’t dating. We’re just best friends, that's it.”

Mina appears...embarrassed. Or that’s what Sana would think from a single glance. But paying more attention, with the way Mina’s lips curl up at the end, and how her body loosens up, Sana can easily see that Mina is relieved.

“Right, Sana?” 

Sana looks at Momo who’s making wide eyes at her. “Oh, right. Nothing but platonic love for this girl. We’re both single like pringles, ready to mingle.”

That last part may have been too much because Momo rolls her eyes but she still sends her a grateful smile. They start walking again and Sana is left to her thoughts.

The easy-going last semester she’d hope for may not be looking good at all for her.

~~~~

It’s only an hour into their time at Momo’s house when Sana almost gets a heart attack from Momo waiting for her outside the bathroom.

“What the hell?!’

Momo puts her hands in a praying position. “My bad didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Why were you standing here?”

“I have the biggest favor to ask of you.”

Sana doesn't like where this is going. “No, I will not play wingwoman for you.”

“That’s not what I was gonna ask...sort of? I think?”

“What do you need, Momo?”

“Can you pretend that you have an emergency?”

Yeah, Sana doesn't like this at all. “And why on Earth would I do that?”

They had gone straight to Momo’s room as soon as they arrived. Momo had offered to connect her switch to the TV so they could all play together but as soon as Mina spotted her switch, her eyes had sparkled and she immediately jumped into asking Momo what games she had and if she liked any other video games.

Aside from being an angel, Mina happened to be a gamer. 

Sana, who wasn’ much into games, had laid on Momo’s bed in pure boredom as she scrolled mindlessly through her Twitter feed. It irked her how Mina managed to fit right into Momo’s room so easily.

“I know you’re gonna say I barely know her and we’re practically strangers besides sharing a passion for Animal Crossing but Sana, I think I’m gonna like this girl. Like, really like her.”

These were words that Sana never wanted to hear from Momo but she knew it would be inevitable. Still, they pierced her heart like daggers.

“You’re right, I am gonna say you two are basically strangers. You’re just infatuated with her looks.”

And maybe she is letting her bitterness get the best of her but she can’t help it when some girl that just transferred to their school has Momo already on her knees for her with such ease. Sana has known Momo since they were kids, she has been by her side for as long as she could remember, through thick and thin, and yet she’s never been able to make Momo smile in the way Mina has already with just one day of knowing her.

“It only takes the brain seconds to minutes to decide whether you like someone or not. Sana, with just one look, I was enthralled.”

“Haste judgments like that always lead to disaster.”

Momo crosses her arms defensively. “Or they lead you to the best outcome you’ve ever had.”

And Sana can’t argue against that because, on the day they first met, in kindergarten, Sana had speedily decided that Momo was the best candidate to sit next to out of all the other kids. And Momo had been using a white crayon on white paper when Sana first saw her. It was a haste judgment that this girl would either be the weirdest person she’d meet or the absolute best.

From that day, Sana learned to appreciate using white crayons on white paper because Momo had said that even though you couldn’t see it, your drawing was still there. Wisdom from a five-year-old that couldn’t even count to a hundred yet.

“Fine.” She agrees and Momo bursts with joy.

“Thank you so much for this.”

“Just don’t mess this up. I'm missing your Mom’s amazing tempura for this.:

“I’ll have her cook you a whole batch just for you.”

They go back up to Momo’s room, both unsurprised to find Mina heavily invested in the switch. Sana clears her throat and Mina snaps her up. 

“My dad needs me to pick up a package and he said if I didn’t get it right now he’d banish me from the house.”

Mina’s eyes go wide while Momo looks at her with a _‘Wasn’t that too much?’_ expression. 

“I guess I should be going as well,” Mina puts the switch on the bed. She starts putting on her school jacket. 

Momo sends Sana a panicked look. 

“Oh, no, stay. You should definitely stay and play more switch. Maybe you can show Momo how to treat her residents in Animal Crossing with respect. She’s awfully rude to them.”

“Only the ugly ones.” Momo mumbles.

Mina hesitates still. “Are you sure it’s okay, Momo? I don’t want to overdue my stay.”

“Do it for me, Mina. Keep her company.” Both look at Sana with surprise in their eyes. “I feel bad that I have to leave early, but you two should still hang around, get to know each other more.”

“Okay, I’ll stay.”

Sana grabs her jacket and bag. “Stay for dinner too. I’ll see you two at school tomorrow.”

Then Sana leaves. With a heavy heart and teary eyes.

~~~~

It was expected that Mina would join them from now on. Still, Sana had a tiny sliver of hope that she wouldn’t, despite Momo asking her with pleading eyes if Mina can have lunch with them, hang out with them after class, and on the weekends.

Because Sana is weak to Momo’s puppy eyes, she agrees. 

It’s a Saturday and Sana finds herself once again trailing behind Momo and Mina as they walk around the shopping center. They invested in a conversation about what game Momo should buy next for her Nintendo Switch. 

Sana sighs bored out of her mind. She looks around, hoping any of the shops catch her eye but they just don’t. Sana isn’t in the mood to shop at all anymore.

“What should we eat?” asks Momo.

“You choose.”

“I heard the pizza place in the food court was good, is it true?”

Sana is about to tell Mina that they wouldn’t know because Momo doesn’t like pizza all that much. However, momo responds enthusiastically, “It’s the best. Let’s go there.”

That baffles Sana. She doesn’t say anything however, only following them in silence.

They order a small pizza. It’s big enough for them to have at least two slices each. Momo is hesitant with her slices, taking very small bites. Mina seems to enjoy the pizza as she hums appreciatively. The pizza is whatever for Sana. She eats it without any reaction.

“Are you having fun Sana?”

It stuns her that Mina asks that. “Oh...um...yeah.”

Mina nods. “I’m glad. Do you have any store in mind that you want to go to?”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to buy some new jeans?” 

That was right but she’d forgotten all about it. “Yeah.”

Mina pipes in with, “Then let's do that. I’ve been meaning to get some shorts.”

They finish eating but Sana notes that Momo only finished half a slice. She wonders how charmed Momo was by Mina to even eat something she didn’t favor at all.

When they enter the clothing store, they’re immediately greeted by the workers and are asked if they need any help. They decline politely. Sana usually agrees because she has trouble picking out clothing but Mina had assured her she’d help.

Momo heads off into the shoe section of the store, leaving Sana and Mina alone together. Which doesn’t make sense because she’d thought that Momo would have taken this chance for her and Mina to be alone.

“I think these would suit your legs.” Mina doesn’t give Sana a chance to put her opinion and thrusts them into her hands. “Try them on.”

“But--”

“Trust me.”

Sana obliges and heads to the changing room. As soon as she slides them up, Sana looks herself in the long mirror. They look good on her. She’s tempted to buy them.

“Sana?” Mina calls out from outside. “I brought another pair.”

The jeans are hung over the door and Sana takes them. She tries them on and damn, these look well on her too. 

“Sana?” she calls out again.

“Yeah?”

“Did they fit? Do you like them?”

Sana runs her hands down the material. Flattening any wrinkle. Thinking for a few seconds then answering with, “You were right. They’re perfect.”

“Can I see?”

Sana unlocks the door for Mina to enter. She doesn't know whether to strike a pose or not so she just stands there.

Mina’s jaw slacks slightly. “Whoa...they look way better than I imagined.”

It could be Sana’s imagination but she’s sure Mina’s elevator eyes mean she’s either appreciating her job well done for picking the jeans out or she’s checking Sana out.

“Did you pick your shorts yet?”

“Oh, yeah, I just need to try them on.”

Sana’s hands go to the buttons of the jeans and she almost pops them open. “Um, I need to change.”

“Oh, right! I’ll be out here.”

Sana walks out with the two pairs of jeans in hand, gesturing to Mina she can head on in. She decides to wait outside just in case Mina needs anything. It’s only fair since Mina waited for her.

For the third time, Mina calls out to her. “Sana? Can you come in here please?”

That is something she was not ready to do. “Did you get stuck or something?”

“Uh...something like that.”

Sana closes her eyes as she enters. Privacy is still most important in this situation. “What’s wrong?”

“You can open your eyes, I’m decent.”

Then the sight that greets Sana’s eyes has her holding in laughter. “You’re actually stuck.”

“My bracelet got caught and I can't get it unstuck.”

Mina’s wrist is pressed against the hem of the shorts, between her legs and Sana seriously wonders how the hell that happened. “Just how?”

“I wanted to make sure they fit in all the places but I didn’t expect my bracelet would get stuck in the ripped ends. I don’t want to risk tugging it and ruining it.”

“It wouldn't matter if you planned to buy them.”

“I don’t like how they look on me so I’m not getting them.”

Sana exhales. “How do I help though?”

“Can you see if you can pull my bracelet off?”

This is not an event she was prepared for. Sana is clumsy in all kinds of ways. Tripping on thin air, choking on her spit when she laughs too much, almost losing her life from slipping when she steps outside the shower. So it’d be a miracle if Sana managed to release the bracelet without messing it up further.

Sana crouches in front of Mina, examining the situation. If she can just slide the part of the bracelet up and out it would be okay. But Mina’s wrist is what’s making it hard. “We have to get the bracelet off you first.”

She finds where the lock is and unpins it. Now she can remove the bracelet with ease. And she does just that. The bracelet and shorts are safe.

“Here you go.”

“Thank you so much.”

“No problem.” she’s about to leave but stops at the door. “Those shorts look nice on you.”

“You think so?”

She watches Mina look herself in the mirror, twisting and turning in all kinds of ways. “I wouldn’t lie.”

Mina then smiles at her. “Maybe I’ll get them after all.”

Sana doesn’t know why she told her that. Probably because Mina complimented her so it was only right for her to repay it. Or, Sana thinks, it’s because Mina has this sort of aura that just makes you want to tell her how pretty she is, how good she looks, how nice she is.

Even though Sana wants to hate her, wants to dislike her badly, Mina makes it unfathomable because she hasn’t been anything other than nice to her.

~~~~

The chaos about Mina hasn't died down a single bit. It’s already been a month. Sana constantly hears something about Mina everywhere she goes.

_‘She’s so nice!’_

_'Mina is such a sight for sore eyes.’_

_‘I swear her smile is brighter than the sun itself.’_

Mina this, Mina that. She’s on the tip of everyone's tongue. Sana wonders if it’ll ever die down.

She’s already heard enough from Momo who drones on and on about how wonderful Mina is. Their phone calls and texts are now filled with Momo’s panic and endearment for Mina. And Sana just listens and responds with the bare minimum.

So it was only a matter of time that Mina became a permanent fixture in their friendship. They meet up in the morning to walk to school. Sometimes Momo and Mina meet at Sana’s, sometimes she and Momo meet at Mina’s. Today, however, Momo is missing the day due to an upset stomach so Sana is completely surprised to find Mina waiting outside her house in the morning.

“Oh.” 

“Morning.”

“What are you doing here?” She doesn’t mean for it to come out brusque but it does.

“To walk to school together, of course.” Mina digs into her bag quickly and pulls out a packaged bun. “For you.”

Sana takes it slowly, curious why Mina is giving her food. “Oh...thanks?”

“I wasn’t sure what you’d like so I got you melon but we can trade--”

Sana rips open the package and takes a bite out of it. “I like it.”

Mina visibly relaxes. “That's good to hear...shall we get going?”

Besides the dressing room exchange, Sana and Mina hadn’t been alone. Momo is always with them, making things more vibrant and less awkward. Even though at times Sana felt as if she didn’t exist as Momo and Mina conversed about something together.

“How long have you and Momo known each other?” Mina asks.

Sana had been entranced with walking and the weather that seems to be getting colder. “Since kindergarten.”

“So basically your whole lives.”

Yeah, Sana thinks, and she’s thankful for it. 

“I like to think that Momo and I are soulmates,” She says and half of her regrets it because this is the girl that Momo is trying to win over but the other half of her is proud of saying it because this is also the girl that stands between Momo and her love.

“I’ve always wanted someone like that.”

“Like…?”

“Someone who knows me more than I know myself. A bond stronger than anything in the world.”

Sana doesn’t know what to say so she doesn't say anything. They walk the rest of the way to school in silence. 

Mina’s revelation consumes Sana’s thoughts throughout her morning classes. She starts thinking about how Momo very likely knows her better than she does herself, about their bond is as tough as s diamond and can't be cut easily.

When it’s lunch and one of Sana’s classmates pokes her on the shoulder then points at the door, where Mina is waiting patiently. They have lunch in Sana’s classroom. The hushed murmurs are hard to ignore but Sana already knows they’re all about Mina. 

Some look in awe as if they’ve been blessed by the gods, some have questionable looks as if they’re trying to figure out when Sana and Mina had become close like this. It didn’t matter what they were whispering or thought about, Mina was the center of it all.

And so Sana continues thinking about Mina’s words. She concludes that Momo doesn’t know her more than herself because if she did then she’d know Sana has been in love with her. Their bond is probably not as strong as she hoped for because Momo is stretching it out and trying to include Mina in it every chance she gets.

~~~~

The cultural festival is in a few days. They've spent hours staying after school working on decorations, costumes, the menu, and flyers to hand out. 

Sana usually loves this part. Having silly fun with classmates and doing the arts and crafts. But Sana is wearing a monotonous expression as Momo keeps blabbering about how she's going to work up the guts to ask Mina if she'd like to spend time together at the festival after Momo finishes her waitressing shift.

"I really hope our free time lines up. It'd suck if it didn't."

"Yeah," Sana sighs, a dent between her eyebrows as she concentrates on trying not to mess up painting the poster to advertise their horror cafe. "I bet."

"I wonder what her class is doing."

"Ask her."

Momo looks as if Sana asked her to jump into a pool of electric eels. "I can't do that!"

"It’s a simple question of hey, what's your class doing. That's all there's to it."

"You don't get it Sana. I literally turn into a blushing mess around her."

"You're fine when we're with her together."

"That's because you're there. It’s like this--Mina makes my heart boom crazily but you soothe the chaotic pounding."

Sana isn't sure if she likes the sound of that. “So I bore you?”

Momo is affronted. “I just said you’re soothing. Like honey chamomile tea. When I’m nervous,” she gently pulls the brush out of Sana’s hand, replacing it with her hand. “You make me calm. You’re the best at making sure I keep my shit together.”

Honestly, if they weren’t in the classroom surrounded by their classmates, Sana might’ve blushed and pounced Momo. Instead, she squeezes Momo’s hand and offers an appreciative smile. This moment feels sort of infinite but it’s interrupted by a classmate of theirs calling--more appropriately, screeching--Momo’s name.

The moment of Sana perhaps thinking of the possibility that she and Momo could be more, could be something, comes to an end because scattering off to the door in excitement is Momo as Mina gives her a gummy smile that could warm and break the hearts of the whole student body.

It seems to Sana that Mina has done a swell job in fitting in perfectly into their life. Because now her moments with Momo never seem to last long as they are cut short to accommodate the new moments Momo is surely making with Mina.

Sana goes back to painting, wondering if the way her fist clenches around the paintbrush would break the paintbrush.

~~~~

Sana feigns feeling unwell and heads to the nurse during lunch. She insists that Momo and Mina have their lunch, just after handing Momo the bento her mom made, and she doesn't need their accompaniment. Momo appears grateful, most likely assuming Sana is doing this for her benefit. On the other hand, Mina seems worried and that just makes Sana want to get away all the more.

She lies to the nurse about feeling lightheaded and is offered to either take a nap before resuming class or to head home early if she feels awfully unwell. Sana jumps at the chance to go home.

She retrieves her bag, thankful that Momo and Mina are not present in the classroom. They’re probably sitting in her and Momo’s spot if they hadn’t found a spot of their own. Sana didn't want to think too much into it.

On the way home, she stops by the store for some snacks since she missed lunch and the bento her mom packed didn’t seem all that appetizing anymore. 

It’s on her fifth movie that her parents message her that they’re going out with some friends of theirs. It lightens her mood a bit because her parents are still very much in love and act like they’re the child asking her, the presumable parent, if it's alright they go on a date and stay out late. She replies that they better not drink too much but to still have tons of fun.

Her parent’s love is one of the very few things that keep the tiny light of hope alive in Sana.

Just when she decides to wash up, her doorbell rings. Sana is hesitant because she’s not in the mood for visitors but the curiosity gets to the best of her. When she opens the door, Momo immediately walks right in, excusing for her intrusion, and chucking her shoes off before heading into the kitchen.

It all happens too fast, and although it happens very often, Sana is still stunned. “What are you doing here?”

“You left school early because you weren’t feeling well. I told my mom to make you some soup.”

Sana joins her in the kitchen, her stomach grumbling when Momo begins to unpack the container she hadn’t noticed. “Smells delicious.”

“You haven’t eaten right?”

“No, didn’t have much of an appetite. Until now.”

Momo goes about her kitchen, pulling out the utensils, bowls for the soup and for the rice she also brought along. Sana is informed--demanded to sit at the table to be served. Seeing Momo so in place, so in motion in her kitchen brings inexplicable feelings.

“Where are your parents?” Momo asks as she sets everything down in front of Sana.

“On a date.”

“Forever the romantics. The only dates my parents go on are to all-you-can-eat buffets on their cheat days.”

“I think if you’re with the person you love most, then it doesn’t really matter what you do, don’t you think?”

Momo raises a brow at her. “I guess your parent’s romanticism is genetic.”

Sana puts a spoonful into her mouth, not wanting to comment. Thankfully, Momo lets her eat in peaceful silence. When she finishes, she drags Momo to the living room before she could start washing the dishes, saying she’ll do them later.

“I was also supposed to bring your homework but I forgot it at home,” She says. “But I did bring the bento. Which, you can tell your Mom she doesn’t need to worry about making lunch for me.”

“Oh, why?”

“I’m basically an adult now, I can’t live on packed lunch from my best friend’s mom forever.”

“Is this your way of telling me that you don’t like my mom’s cooking anymore?” Sana jokes and Momo is quick to defend herself.

“No! That’s not why! Her cooking is amazing. I just...I feel bad that she has to make not just for your dad and you but me as well.”

Sana still isn’t sold on it. “It’s never bothered you in all the past years. Why now?”

“Like I said, I’m an adult now. When I'm In college, those lunches won’t be there anymore. I need to get used to fetching food for myself.”

Sana chuckles. “Fetching food? What are you, a stray animal?”

Momo whines, letting herself fall into Sana’s knees. “Leave me alone.”

“Alright, alright, Miss I’m-a-grown-up-now -nd-need-to-fend-for-myself. I’ll tell her and use a better excuse than yours.”

“What are we watching?” Momo grabs the remote and turns Netflix on, surfing through the titles.

Instinctively, Sana’s hand starts combing through Momo’s hair. Playing with the ends. “Whatever you want.”

As long as Momo is like this with her, Sana couldn’t care less. 

It’s halfway during some random movie Momo picked that she turns on her back, big, adoring eyes staring at her, that cause Sana to flinch slightly because she’d been sure with how Momo’s breathing had quieted that she was asleep.

“What’s up?” Sana asks softly.

“Are you afraid of what our future holds?”

Now, Momo is not the type to usually delve into deep topics like this but when she does...Sana knows something is troubling her. 

“I mean, who isn’t afraid of the future. Why, is something wrong?”

“I sometimes get nightmares that in my future I’m alone. That everyone important to me isn’t present.”

Sana smoothes her bangs. “It’s not real. I guarantee I’ll be there no matter what.”

Since day one, it was an unconscious promise she made when she was just five years old. Now, she’s voicing it out as reassurance in hopes it comforts her best friend.

“You’re my favorite person, Sana. Don’t ever leave me.”

It shouldn’t hurt because Momo’s words carry love and tenderness but they still carve into Sana’s heart painfully. All for the reason that even if Momo may not ever be able to promise Sana to be hers solely, Sana would always, in a heartbeat, promise to be Momo’s.

“You’re my favorite, too. I wouldn’t ever dream of leaving you.”

Momo ends up leaving a few minutes after that because it is still a school night. Although, at the door, they embrace each other tightly. Momo probably for the reason of keeping Sana chained to her. Sana definitely for the reason of wanting to keep Momo with her for as long as she can before she leaves.

Because, over time, Sana has realized that it wouldn’t ever be her leaving Momo rather it would be Momo leaving because she is the one, after all, who has been slowly slipping away from Sana and to Mina.

~~~~

It’s the day of the cultural festival. 

Sana has been non-stop handing out flyers. Being cute and bubbly is like her calling. She attracts nearly everyone’s attention with the way she adorably shouting out for everyone to attend her class’s horror cafe. It’s like they are magnetically attracted to her and grab a flyer before she gives them her most cutest anime smile.

Like she imagined, she finished handing out her flyers in a quick time, even after taking a few from her other classmates who were struggling to hand them out. Now she has free time to enjoy the festival.

She takes a stroll around the booths outside, seeing if any of them have food that calls her attention but if she’s honest, her mind is only on Momo and wanting to spend this day with her. They’ve always spent the cultural festivals together, going through the booths and classrooms.

However, Momo is busy at the moment doing her waitress shift in their horror cafe. So Sana figures she might as well drop by and see how it all turned out.

The hallways are cluttered. Students from their school are roaming about if they’re not actively participating in their class’s event. There are non-familiar faces among the crowd too. But her GPS is set on her class.

When she gets there, her mind is blown at the line waiting to get in. She knows that a horror cafe is far from original but all these people are lined up, animatedly talking with each other as if this was one of the most popular places in all of Japan. 

Since she’s not really there to be seated, she’s let in. Sana just wants to see what Momo chose to dress up as since she was adamant in not revealing anything about her costume to her.

Black paper had been taped against the windows to block out the sunlight. The desks are draped with purple velvet cloths and were set up as tables in a cafe with electronic candles lights in the center of them. There are webs hung around, plastic bats and spiders, crystal-like lights dangled along the walls to provide more light. One of their classmates even managed to obtain a fog machine.

One corner of the classroom is blocked, presumably where the makeshift kitchen/change room is. She brushes past the curtains and marvels at how well her classmates are working together. There are three of them making drinks, three of them making sure their pastries stay stocked, four waiters/waitresses collecting orders, and two of them acting as makeup artists to touch up the other’s costumes.

“Sana!”

She whips her head to the curtain entrance. Her eyes widen at Momo’s costume. “You’re...Sadako?”

Her long black hair is tousled forward as best as it could be, probably all held by gel or hairspray, the white dirtied, stain dress accentuating her body well, and her face is painted white and gaunt. It’s not perfect but Momo is pulling it off really well.

“I look good, don’t I?” Her cocky tone doesn’t slip past Sana’s ears.

“I thought you were aiming for something scarier.”

Momo deflates. “Sadako is scary. You’re just acting like I don’t frighten you.”

When Momo fixes all of her hair to the front of her face and stands like Sadako would, Sana can’t help but giggle. “You look way more adorable than frightening.”

“At least pretend for my own sake.” Before Sana could respond, Momo is ordered to take orders out to the tables. “Duty calls. I still have a few hours left but I’ll be free for the night.”

She doesn't even dare bring up Mina. “Text me when you’re done.”

Momo salutes her before heading back out.

She manages to swipe a muffin before leaving as well. Maybe she wouldn’t need to worry about spending the cultural festival alone.

~~~~

And a few hours later, Sana receives an apology from Momo through text. 

She ran into Mina and worked up the courage to ask her to hang out alone. Meaning, Sana would be alone after all while Momo and Mina spend it together. 

Sana sighs, wanting to yell out in anger. It isn’t fair. She hates how easily Mina can swoop Momo away without lifting a finger. All the while Sana is struggling to keep Momo beside her.

It’s just not fair. 

Sana is tempted to find some of her classmates and be with them. It wouldn't be the same however. Being with anyone else just isn't the same.

“I’m so hyped for the fireworks!” She hears from her right.

“Same! It’s the first time we have them. Our budget usually can’t cover it but this year we must've had some spare funds for them.”

That was definitely new and definitely something she had no knowledge of. 

Sana has a love-hate relationship with fireworks. She likes the shapes and colors of them and is amazed at how they work. It’s the loud crackling and booming noise they make that absolutely terrifies her.

And Momo feels the same way. 

So it’s only natural for her to go searching for Momo to warn her because she's not answering her calls or responding to her texts, not like she’d have her attention on her phone anyway. She doesn't have Mina’s number either.

She asks students left and right if they'd spotted Momo but none of them know where she went. Sana finds out when the fireworks are being done and when she checks the time there happens to be only fifteenish minutes until they'd go off. 

Sana jogs frantically, whipping her head all around to spot any sight of Momo or Mina. 

In the past, when Sana and Momo attended festivals with fireworks they were always together to cover each other’s ears. Back then it was a sort of 'ill protect you if you protect me’ sort of thing. They each could have covered their own ears but something about being protected by Momo and protecting her made Sana feel magical and important.

She should be worrying about her own sake but she never does when she knows there's a risk of Momo in any kind of danger. Little or big.

Sana counts off all the places she's checked. Nearly all the classrooms of every floor, the gym, the courtyard, all the outside booths, even the restrooms.

The only place left is the rooftop. But the door is always locked. Still, Sana takes off to the staircase and hopes her legs don't give out from exhaustion as she runs up to the rooftop entrance.

There are only a few minutes left. So when she gets to the door, she pants tiredly, trying to regain normal oxygen levels.

Sana turns the knob of the door and to her surprise, it turns and the door opens. She cautiously peeks her head out and there they are.

It’s only their backs but she doesn't need super vision to know what Momo looks like from the back.

"My adrenaline is pumping from being up here." Sana hears Mina say although she's very soft-spoken but up on the rooftop it’s quiet and calm, all the ruckus from the festival seems as if it's miles away.

"I'm not good with heights."

"Then why are we up here? I didn't mind joining the loud fun."

Sana strains her vision. It's gotten darker by the minute. Thankfully the moon is bright enough to outline their figures at least. She sees Momo scratch the back of her head. A nervous habit.

"I mean, this isn't too high up so I'm okay but I wanted to come up here because...I wanted to be alone with you."

No. Sana wants to jump out and stop everything.

"Oh?"

"Mina--"

"Do you--"

They both stop then laugh. Sana cringes. It’s like a scene right out of a drama.

"You go first."

"Mina...I really--"

Then fireworks blast into the air and Sana flinches, instantly covering her ears while trying to keep watch on the scene before her.

Momo does the same, covering her ears as she yelps with fright.

Sana almost runs out to Momo but what stops her is Mina that places her hands over Momo’s. It’s like she's offering double the muffle and Sana’s not sure that's how it works but as she watches Momo’s posture straighten up, she's scared of how safe, how secure Momo looks.

It was always Sana taking care of Momo. Always her being there when she was scared as she watched scary movies, always her that offered to stay up all night when Momo had her insomniac moments, always her that covered Momo's ears to protect her from the scary loud sounds of fireworks.

But now...Sana isn't the one making sure Momo feels safe. It’s Mina.

The fireworks go on for about five minutes. When they're over, her arms fall to her sides listlessly as she carries on watching whatever it was happening between Momo and Mina unfold.

"Not a big fan?" Mina asks, pulling her hands away.

It’s then a crack makes its first form on Sana’s heart when Momo catches Mina’s hands.

"I really like you. I think you're awesome and nice and so wonderful and completely unmatched to anyone I've ever met."

That hurts somehow.

Sana hears Mina inhale deeply.

"Momo, I--"

"You don't feel the same and that's okay. Really. I just wanted to tell you."

There's a very tiny sliver of hope that Mina does not bear any mutual sentiments. 

But Mina shakes her head. "I like you, too. You're pretty marvelous yourself."

Sana should leave. She should walk away before her heart cracks further. 

"Seriously?!"

Mina nods. "I know it hasn't been long since we've known each other but you...you made me feel so comfortable and free to be who I really am."

"Is there another Mina you show others?"

Mina looks down. "Nobody ever tries to get to know the real me and when I accidentally show them...they leave. All they see is the outside, my looks are what all that matters to them..."

"Thank you for showing me the real Mina."

Sana is intruding but her feet won't budge. Hearing every bit of this is wrecking her, pulling at the seams of her heart she's trying to keep together.

"Can I...kiss you?" Momo asks softly.

Sana sees Mina nod slightly. When Momo starts leaning in, Sana finally moves away. She starts running down the stairs, out of the school building, past the students, past the entrance gate. Aimlessly running in any direction.

Right now, Sana just needs to get far away.


	2. two

Walking home after running away had been hell. Her feet ached and her legs were cramped by the time she got home. She couldn’t even find the strength to walk to her room so she settled for sitting and falling asleep by the door.

She'd been woken up by her father who was supposed to go out and get breakfast for them. The concern in his eyes and voice only made Sana burst into tears as she fell into her father's warm embrace.

So instead of fetching breakfast, he proposed to make omelet rice, her favorite dish he makes, as she washes up.

So here Sana was, soaking in the warm bath her mother started for her after she'd woken up only minutes after hearing Sanas cries.

She slides down further into the bath, the water just below her nose. Sana closes her eyes and tries her absolute best to not let her mind stray to last night's event. The cultural festival is typically something she'd want to remember and store it in the shelf of memories she's made in high school but this one only brings overflowing sadness.

This memory is not one she'd like to keep shelved. If anything, she wants to lock it up and store it away forever. Never to be reminded of again. That, however, is simply impossible because all she's having are reruns of Momo leaning into Mina and--Sana slides fully into the water, eyes shut tight, breath held for as long as she can manage.

It’s all too overbearing. 

She should have seen it coming though. 

If anything, she hates herself most at the moment because she tried hard to convince himself that there was at least some hope for her. That hope was crushed last night.

Sana is heartbroken and doesn’t know how to recover. If she can.

~~~~

Momo had tried contacting her but Sana had made an excuse that she was busy entertaining family visitors. It wasn’t enough time to piece herself together but as the new start of the week rolled by she needed to pack away the broken pieces of herself and fix them at a later time.

She had texted Momo that she would see her in class rather than when they usually did to walk to school together. Her excuse was that her father wanted to drive her. It’s not like she could prolong avoiding Momo and Mina forever but this little extension was much needed.

When she walks to her class, there is chatter all around her. Probably about Mina, as always. Nothing new, same old stuff.

Momo perks up when Sana walks through the door. “Finally you’re here!”

“Yeah, I am.”

“I’ve been dying to tell you all weekend.”

Sana already knows what it was. “Oh? Did I miss something?”

“First, I’m really sorry I blew you off at the festival but--”

“It’s fine. I get it. You saw your chance and took it.”

“Thank you for understanding but back to the point,” Momo then motions for Sana to lean in close. “I kissed Mina.” She whispers in her ear.

I know, I saw everything, is what Sana is thinking. “Really?”

“We were at the rooftop and I confessed to her and then asked if I could kiss her and she said yes and I did and wow! Better than the fireworks!”

“That’s...good for you, Momo.” Sana wants to be genuine. Wants to be sincere but she’s wavering the lines of a supportive best friend and an evil bitch that wants to ruin everything. “So, are you two like...a thing?”

Then Momo blushes. “Well...she asked me out on a date...so, not yet but maybe soon?”

Their teacher walks in and Sana scurries to her seat before being able to say anything else. Not like she wanted to keep hurting herself with that anyway. But it’s all she thinks about during class.

~~~~

The days go by and winter break comes quick. Sana is spending her time studying and staring at late replies from Momo every day.

Ever since Momo had told her that Mina asked her out for a date, they’ve been joined at the hip. That one date turned into two, into three, then four, and to whatever number they were on because Sana lost count. She’s not surprised if they’re official already and Momo just hasn't told her.

Not as if Momo has been keeping in touch during break either way.

Just like that, the Sana and Momo that turned into Sana, Momo, and Mina has now turned into just Mina and Momo.

Sana wonders if Momo even remembers about her. Probably not but she could dream that she is all that Momo knows and remembers. In her dreams, there is no Mina, only Sana and Momo. In that dreamland, Momo loves her like Sana loves her.

Sadly, dreams end and reality takes over.

Her reality consists of a Sana that is in love with a Momo who only has eyes for the angelic second-year transfer Mina.

~~~~

Winter break ends and school is back in session. She definitely doesn’t want to go because she doesn’t think she could handle seeing Momo and Mina again now that they are a couple. Momo had revealed to her only a few days before the break ended through a text that she asked Mina to be her girlfriend and Mina said yes. 

Sana had struggled to type out her reply of congratulations because she couldn’t stop crying. She guessed the heavy feeling that settled in her chest wasn’t a health condition but rather the crushing pain of unrequited love.

But she needed to be the best friend that Momo knew she was. So if putting up with this hurt was part of the job, Sana would deal with the pain. 

~~~~

Sana’s morning started okay. Her mother left her breakfast ready before leaving for work but it was cold by the time Sana got to it. At least her bento was packed already.

Then, it went from okay to bad because on the walk to school, a bird pooped on her shoulder.

She was already over it.

She thinks it’s going to get better when she spots Momo at her shoe locker. Momo always makes everything better even though lately seeing her stings Sana’s heart a bit.

However, she's completely wrong because when Momo takes out her indoor shoes and bends down to slip them on, Sana is greeted with the sight of Mina. This is when her morning goes from bad to absolutely terrible because not only does her mood turn sour at not being able to have Momo to herself for at least a few minutes, her heart shatters when she notices that under Mina’s school jacket is a famous piece of clothing.

Momo's (and Sana’s) favorite sweater. It wasn't anything special, just a plain navy sweater that was four years old. But Momo had claimed that it was the softest, most comfiest, warmest sweater she'd ever gotten. 

But along the way, Sana had started using it more than Momo. It started when Sana had stumbled on the stairs during lunch and spilled her juice all over her blouse in their first year of high school. She was mega embarrassed and the thought of wearing a soaked shirt for the rest of the day was terrible.

Luckily, Momo had worn the sweater for extra warmth because the days were getting colder and the sweater that came with the uniform just didn't do the job. So, when Sana had hurried to Momo, in near shambles and embarrassment, Momo was quick to shrug off her sweater and give it to Sana to change into.

When she had come out of the restroom, changed into it, Momo grinned childishly and said, _‘It looks way better on you than it does on me.’_

To Momo it was an easy compliment to give to her best friend. To Sana, it meant everything and more.

Sana finally believed all the good words Momo claimed her sweater to be. But most of all, Sana loved that it had Momo’s comforting scent which was enough to provide her sheer tranquility for the rest of the school day. She had wanted to give it back right away but a part of her wanted to hold on to it a bit longer.

A bit longer was supposed to be a few days but it had turned into weeks which turned into months. Momo never bothered about it and Sana never urged herself to return it. 

In simple words, Sana became attached to Momo's sweater even after it lost its scent from the washing and was replaced with her own from all the wearing she's done. After having it for a whole year, she gave it back when the season had become cold again because she knew Momo relied on it for extra warmth.

She walks up to them. Mina spots her first, offering a gentle wave. Sana doesn't wave back, only gives a tight-lipped smile.

Momo turns around and grins widely at her. Before this, it would have done wonders to Sana but now it...feels different. It hurts more.

Momo seems to notice her dampened mood and lays a hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently. "You okay, Sana?"

No. She's not. Nothing is okay. Sana wants to explode with how everything hasn't been okay since Mina arrived. Sana has been drowning in an ocean of sadness and can't seem to find land at all.

But Sana is good at pretending that everything is well and always has been. She nods lightly. "Of course, I'm just annoyed because a bird pooped on me."

If this was before Momo would have come to the rescue with her sweater just like she did before. But she doesn't. Momo grimaces, pulling her hand away. It's not meant to be rude but Sana takes it offensively.

"I have some wipes if you'd like," Mina says, already searching through her bag rapidly.

Sana has half the mind to decline. Not intent on having anything from Mina that'll only add light to her angel-like persona. But they're already in her hand as Mina offers a sympathetic smile.

"Thanks, I'll pay you for them."

Mina waves her off. "No worries. I also once got pooped on last year and ever since I started carrying these around so I totally understand how you feel."

Momo places an arm around Mina’s shoulder. "You're such a lifesaver."

There's nastiness boiling inside her. Sana feels irritation bubbling because Mina doesn't understand at all. She never will nor need to.

Because Mina has Momo the way Sana has wanted her for so long.

Mina will never understand what it’s like.

Sana hastily wipes at her jacket, slips on her indoor shoes, tossed her normal shoes in the locker, and doesn't regard them again before heading to class.

It’s not like they'd notice her absence with how hypnotized they are with each other.

~~~~

Throughout class, Momo has been trying to catch her attention but Sana pays no mind. Still not in the mood to act like she's fine.

Its lunchtime and Sana stays at her desk, unpacking her bento. Momo would be eating with Mina. Again. They would invite her, well Mina used to ask her to come along but aside from Sana not wanting to be a third wheel, with her eyes Momo would pleadingly ask if she could have alone time with Mina, so she has made her desk her usual spot now.

But today, Momo pulls her up, ignoring Sana’s protests. "Let's eat at our spot."

"What about Mina?"

"What about her?"

"Aren't you eating with her?"

They walk down the stairs. Head out to the courtyard. Their bench isn't much, it's dingy and old, but it was near the garden so the flowers made up for it.

"Mina is eating with some girls from her class."

Sana loses her appetite. Of course. She was now a second choice. "Right."

"Plus, she made me realize how bad of a friend I'd been." Momo takes a bite out of her rolled egg. 

"Huh?"

"I've been doing a terrible job as a best friend. I'm sorry."

"You're fine, Momo. It’s okay, you're in a relationship now so it’s normal for you to want to spend a lot of time with Mina." 

"Still doesn't change the fact that I've ignored you."

Sana looks over at Momo’s bento. Intent on changing the subject. She doesn't like it when Momo feels this way. "What’d your mom pack for lunch?"

Then Momo brightens a bit. "Oh! My mom didn't make this, Mina did. She made it all herself."

And Sana is back to her sorrows. Momo had insisted on Sana’s mother not making lunch for her too because she didn’t want to rely on it yet here she was relying on the food provided by her girlfriend.

She's not surprised. Mina’s probably an excellent chef given the way everything is crafted and looks like it was made in a Michelin restaurant.

"Its Friday, let's have a sleepover at my house. Just us two. The entire weekend." Momo says then offers to share some of her lunch.

Sana declines the food politely but not the invitation. Finally having time with just her and Momo might be what she needs. "I’ll bring the snacks."

Its the way her eyes curve adorably, making them look as if they're shut as she shows her pearly whites that soothes the burning flames inside Sana. She wanted to be mad but Momo had all the powers to extinguish her.

From the moment they entered Momo’s house to initiate their sleepover, Sana had expected their time to be filled with Mina related conversations but none of that happened. It was just about them two. Her and Momo.

They started by watching a movie. Then had dinner. After that, they had gone to a convenience store to stock on snacks because their plans consisted of pigging out as they stayed up all night catching up.

Sana was soaring. It was the happiest she's been in a while. She thinks that Momo is the key to her happiness. She always has been. Sana never had anything less of joyous moments with Momo.

Until recently of course. With the development of her best friend's relationship, Sana was tossed into a new world where Momo no longer could be the source of her happiness. It was new and different. Sana didn’t know how to deal.

But like a savior, Momo sweeps right in to catch Sana before she falls.

Currently, it’s some time in the early morning. Probably around three am. Their plans to pull an all-nighter is cut when they had decided that they’ve lost their touch to stay up late. So now they're laying on Momo’s bed.

Momo stretches out on her back, sighing constantly. Sana can't relate, she's stiff as a rock. It’s not like they've never shared a bed but now that Momo has been very likely sharing beds with Mina lately and not her, it doesn't feel right.

She berates herself for always letting thoughts of Mina infest her mind. It seems that as much as Sana wants Mina to disappear from her and Momo’s life, the more she thinks about her. It’s irritating because the last thing she wants in her head when she’s finally alone with her best friend is her best friend's girlfriend.

But it’s no use because the silence they laid in is broken when Momo tells her, "I'm gonna tell Mina I love her this weekend."

Sana’s heart breaks as well. "You are?"

"Yeah, I've got this whole set up in my head. We'll go on a date to the arcade, play some games, probably waste a lot of our money on trying to get each other plusses from the claw machine. We'll get something to eat and then I'll walk Mina home. I'll tell her on the doorstep and then fireworks and rainbows will come out."

Sana swallows the bitterness rising in her throat. "Sounds..." Momo looks at her then, hope gleaming in her eyes. "Magical."

"That's exactly what I was going for."

As much as Sana wants Momo to be happy, she can't help but ask, "But why?"

Momo gives her an inquisitive look. "Why what?"

Sana hesitates. She can either speak from her heart, ignoring the warning signals from her heart. Or, concede to her logical mind and tell her heart that its no use.

She wants to ask, _why her? Why not me?_

But never has she seen Momo shine so brightly then she has with Mina.

So Sana asks instead, "I'm just wondering why this soon? You haven't been dating long."

If Sana counted the exact time they’d been dating it would be only two months. 

Momo sits up, and Sana follows suit. "I think that's where humans mess up a lot in love. We're taught to believe that you must wait a certain amount of time to tell that special someone you love them when really, you should just do it as soon as you figure it out. It'd save people a lot of time and heartbreak. "

And Sana wishes she would have heard this piece of wisdom when she realized she was in love with her best friend. It surely would have saved her from the heartbreak and wasted time thinking of the what-ifs.

~~~~

Waking up to a text from Mina asking her if they can hang out for the day, is the last thing Sana expected ever to happen in her life. It’s Saturday and Sana planned on staying in, probably to find a show to binge-watch before the impending doom of studying for finals occurs.

Yet, as the sleep fades away from her mind, Sana replies to Mina that they can.

Mina had a follow-up text, asking if there was anything in particular Sana wanted to do but Sana had no motivation to go out so she ends up inviting Mina over to her house. Why she thought that was a good idea beats her. An hour later, her doorbell rings and before Sana can get to it, her mother is already welcoming Mina inside.

“You must be Mina,” Her mother says.

Mina nods shyly, offering her mother a box. “I brought some pastries.”

Her mother fawns. “Oh, thank you, Mina. I’ll unpack these so you girls can have some with tea.”

Even her mother is already charmed by the ever so illuminating Mina. Sana wonders if there's a soul out there that isn't so enthralled by the mere sight of Mina. Probably not, she figures.

Sana motions for Mina to follow her as she informs her mother, “We’ll be in my room.”

Unlike in Momo’s room, Mina stands right out in hers. She doesn’t fit right into it like a chameleon in its surroundings. She stands awkwardly in the center, fiddling with her purse. Even Sana feels weirded out by having the one person she’s been trying to find reasons to have no liking for in her room.

“Wanna watch a movie?” She suggests because nothing else is coming to mind.

Mina nods. “Yeah, let's do that.”

They settle on Sana’s bed. In the inches between them sits awkwardness. Sana starts going through the movie titles. “You can pick.”

“I’m fine with anything.”

Sana just picks a random title. A movie in English. Not like she’ll be able to pay attention anyway as her mind is going into overdrive in trying to process what the hell is happening at the moment. Mina is at her house, in her room, next to her on her bed, in complete awkward silence.

A few minutes later Sana’s mom knocks just before coming in with the pastries Mina brought and tea for them. Maybe eating something would save them from this unpleasant ambiance.

They sit across each other on the floor, quietly eating and sipping. 

Sana would look at Mina and then glance away. She wants to say something but doesn’t have anything to say. It’s not like she ever imagined being alone with Mina like this.

More minutes pass by when Sana decides that she absolutely can't handle this cumbersome feeling. “Why are you doing this?” She asks and maybe it’s not the best question but it’s better than nothing.

Mina freezes on the spot, her mug halfway to her mouth. “Sipping...tea?”

“No, I mean--” Sana frantically gestures back and forth between them. “This.”

“Hanging out with you?”

“Yes.”

“I want to get to know you better, Sana.”

“But why?” It’s not like Mina needed to. It’s not like Sana wanted her to. “If you feel obligated to get close to me just because my best friend is your girlfriend then--”

But Mina intercepts with, “I’m doing this because I want to, Sana. Momo has nothing to do with this. I want to know who you are, your likes and dislikes. Momo may have approached me and introduced us but you...you didn’t have to let me into your friendship but you did.”

Sana wanted to correct her. It wasn’t as if Sana had a choice in deciding whether Mina would be a new addition to their friendship, Momo did everything on her own. But she remembers what Mina was telling Momo the night of the cultural festival.

“You don’t have many friends, do you?” She winces slightly at her question because of the straightforwardness of it. “Sorry, I--”

Mina shakes her head. “It’s fine. It’s true, I don’t. People only try to befriend me because they either have certain intentions or because they think my “popularity” will rub on them.”

“Did you think I was the same or that I would simply turn you away?”

“Honestly,” Mina sighs. “I didn't know what to expect. I never do.”

It’d be a lie if Sana said she never thought to turn down her trying to put a bridge of friendship between them. Since the day Momo waltzed back into their classroom during lunch, charmed and dazed, Sana already wanted to get rid of Mina. Yet, every attempt she could have made never came to be. 

Sana could be honest right now. She could tell Mina the truth. That Sana isn’t as sugar sweet Mina must believe her to be. Because ever since Mina arrived, Sana never wanted anything to do with her. 

But Mina looks downhearted. 

“You’re a kind girl, Mina. You’ve proved that already. You’re good to Momo too and that…” Sana composes herself. It’s beyond her why she’s acting so cordial when she’s usually carrying a sort of resentment toward Mina for being in the place of Momo’s heart that Sana has yearned to be in for so long. “That’s all that matters.”

Mina tilts her head, smiles at her. “You’re a great friend, Sana. Momo is lucky to have you in her life. I hope one day…” then she stops mid-sentence, trailing off as she shakes her head. “Nevermind that.”

Sana doesn’t understand at all. What does she hope for? “You’re strange.”

“Huh...that’s new. I always get pretty, cute, beautiful, gorgeous, angel-like, goddess, etc..” 

At first, Sana doesn’t realize the joking tone behind it because she’s positive that Mina has received all those descriptions. When Mina starts chuckling she finally gets it. “Gosh, you even have a terrible sense of humor.”

Before she knows it, they're talking comfortably. Exchanging childhood stories. Their favorite foods, shows, music. It’s extremely bizarre to Sana that moments ago she’d had tons of bitter thoughts about Mina but now she was conversing with her like a longtime gal pal.

It’s then Sana registers that there really isn’t a single thing about Mina to dislike. It was only Sana’s jealousy creating all sorts of things to pin on Mina to have a motive in wanting to despise her. 

She hasn’t fully decided how to feel about Mina. Whether to finish building the friendship that Mina has started or to turn away from the unfinished bridge because this still is the girl who was able to move Momo’s heart when Sana never could.

“Thank you for hanging out with me,” Mina says as Sana accompanies her to the door. “I hope we can do this again.”

“Yeah, sure,” She answers sincerely.

Mina hugs her quickly, catching Sana off guard completely, causing her to stand there like a statue. “I hope one day we can be as close as you and Momo are.”

Strangely enough, Sana doesn’t entirely abhor the idea of it as she thought she would have. Maybe this is a sign to finally start learning how to unravel from the tight hold that being in love with her best friend has her in.

But she can’t. At least not yet. Not when Momo still unknowingly holds Sana’s heart. Not when the sight of Momo and Mina together, in love, still stings Sana’s heart. Not when Sana still wishes she was Mina.

Sana, however, can imagine her and Mina being good friends one day because in all the moments they’ve happened to share together, Mina has always treated her kindly. 

~~~

Feelings suck. 

Sana is absolutely fed up with how shitty she’s been feeling.

It’s close to graduation and she doesn’t have a single idea on what college she wants to apply to or what she even wants to study. Sana is spiraling and she doesn't know how to end it.

Momo is applying to a dance school. Sana is positive she’ll get in which is wonderful for her but it reminds Sana that she doesn't have her shit together.

She’s isolated herself. Using studying for the final exams as an excuse to not be around Momo and Mina or anyone else. Although she’s slowly coming to terms that she can’t hate Mina it’s still a struggle to maintain the facade of being okay. It’s exhausting and she’s done with it.

So Sana chose to isolate in a way to not risk saying or doing anything that'll ruin everything.

But going to school and then coming right back home when the day is done and holing herself up in her room is unhealthy and affecting her in so many ways. She's losing motivation, it’s as if the colors in the world are dull and fading, her thoughts are starting to consume her.

_‘Just forget about Momo, she doesn't love you.’_

_‘You'll never be Mina so give up.’_

_‘Why bother with love when it only hurts you?’_

So many thoughts like these filter through her mind day and night. Sana wants to make it stop but doesn't know how to.

And so she realizes what she must do in order to move on from this.

Sana heads to Momo’s house with her heart on her sleeve.

~~~

She texts Momo that she's outside. Some minutes pass by and Momo comes out, confusion and worry settled on her face.

“Sana? Is everything okay?”

She almost gives the automatic response of yes but puts a pause on that. “No, it’s not. Everything sucks.”

Momo embraces her tightly. “You can tell me anything. I’m here for you.”

Sana can't help but wonder if this would be the last hug Momo gives her after tonight. So she hugs back just as tight. “I’m scared.” She confesses.

“Is it because we’re graduating soon?” Momo runs a hand through Sana’s hair, lightly scratching her scalp. “You know no matter what we're gonna always stay in each other’s life.”

“You gave Mina your sweater.” It’s random to Momo but Sana just needs to know.

“My sweater?”

“It’s your favorite, why would you give it to her?” _Why would you give it to her and not me?_

“What--It’s just a polyester sweater, Sana.” _It’s more than polyester, it’s a piece of you._

“But you told me that--” She stops herself just before she could finish with, _‘it looks better on me than it did you.’_.

Momo asks, “Are you mad that I lent Mina my sweater?” and her tone is full of confusion.

It was more than the actual sweater. It was because Momo liked Mina better. It was because Momo became mesmerized by Mina instantaneously. It was because Sana has been next to Momo, loving her with everything that she is, only for Momo to never look her way.

“Momo...I...need to tell you something.”

She leans back to look at her face. Momo’s smile should be reassuring but all it does is make Sana’s heart flip. 

“What is it?”

“I…” She closes her eyes, afraid to even see Momo’s reaction. “...I love you, Momo.”

“Oh? I love you too.”

Of course, she wouldn’t get it.

“No. Momo,” Sana opens her eyes. “I _love_ you. I’m _in love_ with you.”

Momo blinks. “What?”

“I love--”

“How long? Since when?”

Sana thinks back to when she realized her feelings. And it all dates back to the day Momo lent her sweater. Specifically December 3rd. 

Before she could answer, Mina pops out. "Momo, dinner is--Sana?"

Momo retracts from her, looking at Mina instead. It hurts so much.

"Hi, Mina."

"Are you staying for dinner?"

"I--" She looks at Momo who looks away. “No, I’m not.”

"Oh, that's too bad. We haven't seen you much lately."

"Yeah...I've been studying for exams and whatnot."

"Let's do a study group." Mina offers and if Sana never had confessed she might have taken the offer.

She tries to find Momo's eyes but she's being evaded when Momo strictly keeps her focus on Mina. "I can't."

She expects Mina to question her but she doesn't push. Rather, she deflates. "Oh...okay."

"Sorry..."

"Its okay, Sana." Mina then asks Momo, "You coming?"

Momo clears her throat. "In a moment, you go on ahead."

Mina waves just before going back inside.

"I shouldn't have told you."

Momos shoulders drop. "Why didn't you tell me this sooner?"

"Would it have mattered? Would you have reciprocated?" 

"You're my best friend, Sana. You know I love you but..."

Sana shakes her head. "Not like you love Mina. Not like I love you. I get it."

Of course. Why would Momo ever love her? She doesn't have the looks of a goddess. Nor the glow and kindness of an angel. Sana isn't elegant and poise like Mina is. Sana isn't half as pretty as Mina.

Sana is nothing like Mina. If anything, all they share is loving the same girl. Except, that girl only loves one of them back.

And Sana always knew that it wasn't her, would never be her.

"I just wanted to tell you because I was tired of it consuming me. We can forget this ever happened and act like we always did. Just a pair of best friends."

"How can I forget, Sana? I don't have to see it to know you're hurting...I hurt you."

And Sana refuses to let Momo think that. "No, you didn't. It’s my fault. I guess...like that white paper you colored on with a white crayon...I thought even if you didn't see that I was in love with you...you'd still know that love was there..."

Momo reaches out to her, "Sana..."

But Sana steps back. "You'll always be my best friend. But I...I can't watch you as you watch Mina...I can't watch you hold her hand, put your arm around her shoulder, give her your smile not just with your lips but with your eyes, laugh with her...when you kiss her...I just can't..."

"What are you saying?"

Sana had been in a flurry deciding which college to attend. At this moment she remembers her teacher telling her that with her grades she could even study abroad. 

"I'm applying to colleges in America."

"You're gonna leave?"

"If I get accepted...but I won't be gone forever..." Sana gives her a watery smile, her eyes holding unshed tears. "Only until I can learn how to not be in love with you."

"Sana..." Momo's voice cracks. "Don't run away because of me.”

"I'm not running away...just...finding my own path." 

“You said you’d never leave me.”

She now takes steps forward and hugs Momo. "I know and I’m sorry but I need to do this, Momo."

Sana never would have imagined being the one leaving. To be the one that steps away. Yet, she believes it’s the only choice she must make to feel okay with herself.

"Stay for dinner. Please."

She could decline and go home, cry her heart out. Or she could start learning right now how to resign from these feelings and spend time with her best friend and the girl she had wanted to hate and despise so badly but only ended up loving like a friend as well.

"Only because I miss Mina and your Mom’s cooking."

Momo nudges her playfully as they walk inside. It's not going to be an easy journey to heal from the heartbreak but with time...Sana will hopefully be okay. 

~~~~

It’s graduation day. They attend the ceremony and the principal wishes for the third years to be successful and happy. The student president makes her final speech, congratulating the graduating class.

Sana spaces out the entire time because oh my God she graduated.

When it ends, they all head back to their classrooms to say their goodbyes to classmates and teachers. Momo is nowhere to be found but Sana doesn't worry. As she passes through the halls, she is reminded of her times here. The memories she's made. 

Sana enters the classroom and grabs her bag. Her teacher stops her for a moment, congratulating her on getting accepted to study abroad. It was difficult but she managed to get a full ride for four years. Her parents have been trying to hide their sadness due to her moving abroad but they're still supporting her which is all she could ever ask from them. 

Sana’s phone pings. It's a text from Momo, telling her she's already at the gate with Mina. Sana takes off, saying goodbye to this school.

She spots them instantly. How couldn't she when they're waving like lunatics. Sana jogs over to them.

"What took you so long?"

"I was saying goodbye to Sensei."

"Well let's go. We've got a lot to do."

Mina and Momo sandwich her and lock their arms with hers. Sana no longer walks behind them.

Their plans for the day entailed eating Ramen, karaoke, then they'll head over to Mina’s for a sleepover where they'll very likely stay up all night talking about their future.

Momo is going on about how she can't wait to start classes at the dance school. Sana looks at her then switches her gaze to Mina who wears a smile that indicates how in love she is with her best friend. This used to hurt her but when Mina locks eyes with her and gives her an equally loving smile, Sana thinks there isn't anyone better for Momo to love than Mina.

~~~~

They've run out of snacks and Mina is quick to volunteer in getting them. She shuts down their offers to join her.

If she didn't know better, Sana would say this is Mina’s way of giving them their best friend time.

"You leave soon."

Sana plays with the bear plush from Mina’s bed. "Not that soon, we still have some months before I leave in summer."

It’s only April and May that they’ll have together as Sana would be heading to America at the beginning of June to settle in the dorms and start the summer classes she registered for as a way to get used to classes.

"I'm so proud of you, Sana. Getting into college here is already hard enough but you managed to get into one abroad. That's a whole different country, a whole different language."

"Guess paying attention in English class if useful for something."

"I always zoned out."

Sana chuckles. "I know and you'd always get chosen to read and panic because you weren't paying any attention."

Momo reaches for her bag and pulls out a gift-wrapped box. "I have something for you. A sort of congratulation slash farewell gift."

"There's no farewell, Momo, only a see you later."

"Yeah...I know." She places the box between them and gestures for Sana to open it.

Delicately, she peels the wrapping paper off then opens it and her breath gets caught in her throat. Sanas bottom lip quivers. 

"Your sweater..." She whispers.

Momo shakes her head. " _Your_ sweater. I'm giving it to you."

"But it’s your favorite, why would you--"

"I figured you'd need something that reminded you of home and I thought...why not this. You love it just as much as I do, maybe even more.”

Sana splays her hands out against the fabric, caressing it as if it were an ancient relic. “I thought you gave it to Mina,” she mumbles.

“I’m not gonna lie I had planned to but it didn't feel right seeing her in it. I love Mina but this sweater...it fits you the best.”

She didn’t want to cry but Sana learned that keeping her emotions pent up did no good. So, she lets the tears flow as she hugs the sweater close to her. “Thank you for this.”

“I’m gonna miss you a lot but I hope…” Momo pauses, taking a moment to compose herself. “...I hope you find the solace your seeking and I’m so sorry that I can’t give it to you.”

“You’ve already done a lot for me. And I’ll miss you too...and Mina.”

“She really grew on you huh?”

Sana recalls all the moments she and Mina shared together. How in every one Sana tried to think negatively of her and find reasons to hate her but she never could. Mina was too nice and too good to her. 

Even though knowing that Mina was loved by Momo, Sana just couldn’t loathe her. 

“Just like everyone, I was also mesmerized by her. Mina is...she’s amazing and I’m glad you two have each other.”

“She considers you a really close friend, if not a best friend too,” Momo admits.

“I’m starting to feel the same.” It’s the truth because instead of finding reasons to hate Mina she ended up finding all of the ones to like her.

These are the next steps that Sana must take to not hold any painful aches. Finally admitting to herself that she cared about Mina in all the platonic ways felt relieving.

Sana then tells Momo, “You better treat her right and if she tells me otherwise I’m coming back to kick your ass.”

“Hey,” Momo pouts. “What if she’s not treating me right?”

“Mina would never. She's an angel and besides,” Sana’s eyes catch a photo stuck on the mirror of Mina’s dresser and smiles. It’s of Momo and Mina, their cheeks squished together as they grin widely. “She loves you a lot.”

On the opposite side of that photo is another one. It’s the three of them together. One that Mina had shyly asked for during one of their outings. It warms Sana’s heart because from the very beginning Mina never wanted to exclude her. Mina never once forgot about her and always did her best to involve her.

If Sana wasn’t so invested in her own tragedy of unrequited love maybe she could have seen and commended Mina’s efforts. Sana may have to let go of being in love with Momo but if it’s worth anything at least she’s gained the love of a new friend.

Just then, Mina walks in with a bag full of snacks. She freezes by the door. “Did I interrupt?”

“Mina~” Sana whines. “Momo made me cry!”

Momo spluttered. “What--You did that on your own!”

Mina frowned at Momo and settled by Sana, holding her protectively. “Stop being mean to her.”

“I’m not! I’m your girlfriend, you should be on my side!”

Mina tuts at her. “Making me choose sides is not very kind of you.”

“But you’re choosing Sana’s side!” Momo exasperates. She groans as she flops backward on the bed. 

This proceeds for a bit longer. Sana acts like a hurt puppy as Mina is her protector, defending her from Momo. In this moment, Sana knows she’ll be okay.

Everything will be okay.

~~~~

(During the two months they have, they only focus on the present and make plans to do all sorts of fun things.

They go to an aquarium at Mina’s persistence because she wants to see the sharks and penguins. Sana takes pictures of Mina mimicking the shark's mouths. Momo buys the three of them matching propeller hats and Sana feels absolutely ridiculous in it but she laughs when Momo and Mina take turns blowing at each other’s propeller.

Momo is dead set on going clubbing at least once. They get dolled up at Sana’s house. All night they dance together and get lost in the music. A weird coincidence as Sana and Mina end up breaking a heel and Momo offers them both a piggyback ride. It still amazes them that Momo pulls through and carries Sana on her back with Mina on Sana’s back all the way home. (They could have just gotten a taxi but Momo was adamant she was strong enough, all because she has abs.)

Sana brings up one day that she wants to try and beat the jumbo ramen challenge at the local restaurant. Momo and Mina are by her side, offering moral support and motivation to push through. She doesn’t even finish half of it before she runs to the restroom to throw up. Mina holds her hair up while Momo pats her back. 

They all share the wish to try every single ice cream flavor. It, of course, leaves them with terribly upset stomachs at the end of the day but when they discuss their favorites they know it was worth it.

The beach is brought up and Mina suggests they stay at her beach house for the week. It’s put into immediate action. They go shopping for swimsuits together, despite it still not being hot enough for swimming. It was all about setting the mood. They don’t swim but do build sandcastles as if they were children, have bonfires every night to roast marshmallows and have deep talks, run around like maniacs with sparklers. 

So they have as much fun as they can. Momo and Sana are still the bestest of friends. Momo and Mina have fallen deeper in love with each other. But a new development is that Sana and Mina are closer than before, than ever. 

Sana doesn’t say it out loud but Mina has definitely created a place in her heart.)

~~~~

Sana’s nerves are jumbled terribly. She feels nauseous and shaky. 

She looks at her plane ticket and exhales shakily. Soon, she’ll be on a plane flying to a new country to start her new path. 

A hand tilts her head up by the chin. Sana's eyes greet Momo’s gentle grin. “Stop overthinking, everything is going to be fine. You should be excited not looking like your lunch is about to come back up.”

“Maybe I should just stay here.”

“No!” Momo shouts then apologizes silently for the noise level. She starts softer this time. “You’ve worked your ass off for this, you can’t give up before it’s even begun.”

“Will you and Mina visit me?”

“Of course. We've already reserved our breaks just for you,” Momo’s phone goes off. She looks at it, types something, then pockets it. “Mina will be here in a few minutes.”

Sana crosses her arms and legs then uncrosses them. She does this at least four times before Momo puts an end to it, scolding her to stay still. “Sorry, I just don’t know what to do with myself.”

“Why aren’t your parents here?”

“We said our goodbyes at home. I already knew they were going to bawl their eyes out so I made them stay home so they wouldn't cause a scene.” 

She struggled to convince her parents to let her go alone, despite it being a new and foreign place, but in the end, they relented because Sana had said that she needed to start learning how to not rely on them so much anymore. There would be lots of learning that Sana would experience in these next years.

Momo nods pensively. “Yeah, that was a good idea.” then she says, “I'll cause a scene with my wreckless sobbing instead.”

Sana glares at her. “I’ll punch you.”

“You can try but I take no damage due to…” She pauses, Sana supposes for suspense, then whispers, “...these abs.”

She punches her in the “abs”, smirking when Momo hunches over and groans. “Seems like they’ve softened.”

“You just...caught me… off guard,” She huffs out in pain.

“Sure, sure, whatever you say.” Sana stays on the lookout for Mina. “Is she almost here?”

“She said she--oh! There she is!” Momo points at a frazzled Mina who is hurrying to them.

When she gets to them, she shoves a small gift bag in Sana’s hands. “This is for you.”

“What is it?” She looks at Momo to get answers but Momo only motions for her to find out for herself. 

Mina almost looks...bashful. She’s only ever looked like this around Momo. Sana’s eyes narrowed. What could Mina have gotten her and why?

Inside, Sana finds a beanie. She raises a brow in question at Mina. “Why a beanie?”

“Momo gave you her sweater, so I wanted to give you something of mine too. I knitted it myself. Plus, I think it’d look really well on you.”

“Mina…”

“It must’ve been hard for you to accept me because I know how you feel...but I’m really grateful you did. You’re a great person, Sana, one of the most caring and loving girls I’ve ever met. I don’t have a great history with friends, they’ve all gotten close to me due to the unwanted popularity that everyone casts on me based on my looks. But you...you were the most real and for that…” Mina beams at her. “I love you.”

“You...love me?”

“I consider you my best friend, even in such a short time we've known each other, so yes, I love you.”

That cleared up her confusion. Mina only held platonic love for her and although she never thought it to ever happen, Sana doesn't mind it all. Getting to know Mina wasn't anything she pursued and pushed for but if she recounts their moments together, the ones from the start and the recent ones, every time another reason was found to develop the soft spot she now has for her.

Sana doesn’t have many words she could use to relay how she feels. So she figures actions are her best shot. Sana yanks Mina into a bone-crushing hug. “I love you, too, Mina.”

“Room for one more?” Momo asks.

Sana and Mina make room for her to squeeze in.

~~~~

As Sana settles into her seat, she pulls out the beanie Mina gave her from her carry on bag and caresses it. She smiles to herself. Not only does she have Momo’s sweater now but also Mina’s beanie. They both had said these pieces of clothing looked and would look good on her.

But it’s more than just them looking good on her. It’s that she now has a piece of something from the people she loves most, one for the longest and the other unexpectedly. And that’s what really matters.

Sana shrugs the sweater on and adjusts the beanie on her head, not minding the possible strange looks from other patrons because it’s nowhere near cold, and quickly snaps a selfie to send to both Momo and Mina. 

As the plane takes off, Sana finds comfort in Momo’s sweater and Mina’s beanie that are now hers. She’d cherish them and treat them like the treasures they are. 

She closes her eyes, intent on sleeping throughout the trip, and finally finds the serenity she's been searching for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to keep this all angst but I just couldn't do that to Jline (although its still lowkey sad for Sana sksksksk) however i have future plans for a sequel that'll involve Sana in college where she'll get her happy ending hopefully ( or not hehehe) lots of thanks for reading this!!!


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